Pitch a rubbish tv idea

Backslapping time. Well done us. We are fantastic.
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PENK
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Postby PENK » 30 Jul 2006, 17:00

Operation!

The latest reality TV phenomenon sees ten celebrities join the staff of a busy hospital in London. Each week the celebs will be required to perform tasks such as diagnosis, surgery and breaking the news to relatives in order to increase their food and leisure allowance. The celebs must work together as a team but there can only be one winner, as at the end of each week viewers are asked to vote off one of the stars.
Amongst those rumoured to be taking part are Jeremy Vine, Wolf from Gladiators, Jimmy Saville, Gazza, Frank Sidebottom and Tracey Emin. Given no training and no chance to prepare for their ordeal, the stars will have to use their own knowledge and skills as they attempt to ensure the wellbeing and continued existence of patients, including as-yet-unknown surprise guest stars.
With so much at stake the celebrities know they cannot afford to slip up - one tiny mistake and it could mean death for their hopes of getting a decent presenting job. Consequently, tensions run high and there are sure to be arguments and fights aplenty, and more than a few real botched jobs as bickering and one-upmanship distract the stars from the job at hand.
Copehead wrote:I have met Gruff Rhys - although he claimed he wasn't and that he couldn't speak Welsh, as I spoke to him in Welsh, but it was him lying bastard.

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the masked man
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Postby the masked man » 30 Jul 2006, 17:06

Will and Grace

Will Smith wisecracks and mugs for the camera, while Grace Jones just glowers at him constantly. The show gets cancelled mid-broadcast.

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Billybob Dylan
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Postby Billybob Dylan » 31 Jul 2006, 01:02

The Penk wrote:No one else is interested in this thread any more, then?

Sorry. I've been busy.
"I've been reduced to thruppence!"

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Harvey K-Tel
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Postby Harvey K-Tel » 31 Jul 2006, 20:16

Where My Niggaz At?

A group of slaves on an 18th century Louisiana plantation attempt to invent the blues while avoiding 'The Boss', played by Danny DeVito.
If you've got nothing to do, don't do it here.

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Clippernolan
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Postby Clippernolan » 31 Jul 2006, 20:30

What are you lookin’ at?

Every week, we visit a local drinking establishment wherein relevant questions of the day are brought to light by regular patrons such as “what are you lookin’ at? Are you lookin’ at me?”, “Are you some kind of fag?”, “How would you like me to slap that grin right off your face?”, and the perennial “Were you looking at my girlfriend, asshole?”
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Tactful Cactus
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Postby Tactful Cactus » 31 Jul 2006, 20:34

Robot Peace-talks

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The Prof
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Postby The Prof » 01 Aug 2006, 22:41

Ainsley Harriot's Diarrhea Challenge

Team captains Roland Rivron and Emma "baby spice" Bunton compete against each other in the kitchen to prepare a rancid 3-course meal for the other team. First onto the crapper looses.
This weeks winner takes on Penelope Keith in the semi-final.

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Billybob Dylan
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Postby Billybob Dylan » 01 Aug 2006, 22:45

Out Of Africa
Loveable cockney rogue Harry Out (Arthur Mullard) goes to live in Africa with hilarious results.
"I've been reduced to thruppence!"

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Clippernolan
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Postby Clippernolan » 01 Aug 2006, 22:47

Billybob Dylan wrote:Out Of Africa
Loveable cockney rogue Harry Out (Arthur Mullard) goes to live in Africa with hilarious results.


Sound of One Hand Clapping?
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PENK
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Postby PENK » 01 Aug 2006, 22:51

The Exam

Fly-on-the-wall documentary following a group of schoolchildren as they take an exam. Revolutionary new filming techniques allow the viewers to watch several of the children simultaneously as they all sit the exam at the same time. The tension is unbearable as the children know their entire futures could rest on this single test, and it makes for riveting viewing.
We see Robert, 13, as he chews his pen. Will he manage to finish in time? And Jessica, 13, is struggling. What could the answer be? The children have to sit in silence which makes things all the more nerve-wracking.
Copehead wrote:I have met Gruff Rhys - although he claimed he wasn't and that he couldn't speak Welsh, as I spoke to him in Welsh, but it was him lying bastard.

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Billybob Dylan
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Postby Billybob Dylan » 01 Aug 2006, 22:52

Clippernolan wrote:
Billybob Dylan wrote:Out Of Africa
Loveable cockney rogue Harry Out (Arthur Mullard) goes to live in Africa with hilarious results.


Sound of One Hand Clapping?

If you insist:

Sound of One Hand Clapping
Loveable cockney rogue Harry Sound (Arthur Mullard) inherits the sleepy little Chinese village of One Hand Clapping with hilarious results.
"I've been reduced to thruppence!"

Johnny Fartpants

Postby Johnny Fartpants » 02 Aug 2006, 00:31

Knackersack

It's Friday, it's five to five and it's Knackersack ... Knackersack !!!

Prizes include a Knackersack pencil. It's on just after Knackernory.

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king feeb
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Postby king feeb » 02 Aug 2006, 05:30

Ninja Smurfs

These are not your papa's Smurfs. The blue and black martial arts team, led by Papa (John Lithgow, painted blue) fight evil with brute force. Gritty kung fu action. Best episode: Smurfette, the lone female Smurf (Paris Hilton, painted blue) goes into heat and bangs everybody.
You'd pay big bucks to know what you really think.

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king feeb
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Postby king feeb » 02 Aug 2006, 05:33

Ultimate Xtreme Hackeysack Challenge

Bloody, eye-gouging, gonad-ripping no-holds-barred hackeysack action, as a bunch of stoners from college quads all around the world compete for a cheap crappy trophy.
You'd pay big bucks to know what you really think.

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Billybob Dylan
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Postby Billybob Dylan » 02 Aug 2006, 18:12

Full Contact Golf
Golfers are given a 10 minute head start to complete as many holes as possible before a team of ex-NFL linebackers attempt to beat the shit out of them. Extra points for being under par.
"I've been reduced to thruppence!"

Sneelock

Postby Sneelock » 02 Aug 2006, 21:59

Full Contact Golf with your host Tiger Woods
Golfers are given a 10 minute head start to complete as many holes as possible before a team of ex-NFL linebackers attempt to beat the shit out of Tiger Woods.

The Modernist

Postby The Modernist » 26 Oct 2006, 23:43

THE APPRENTICE -THE SEQUEL

Following on from last year's big television hit, Allan Sugar is this year replaced by Kim Sung -Il, despot of North Korea. It's not easy keeping a population of 23 million in subjection and fear. Plucky Kim needs a strong righthand man/woman to help him and we have found six hopefuls to land the job of their dreams. Duties will include organising the secret police, basic torture and maintaining Kim Sung- Il's famed video collection of Quincy. In this week's task, the hopefuls have to arrest the editor of a newspaper and trump up sufficient charges to have him imprisoned for life.
Team A is lead by 26 year old Marketing Director Ben Mycroft from Leicester. Cocky Ben feels sure his background in marketing will lead to an easy win for his team, but he is against Team B lead by 20 year old learning assistant Lilly Garnett, who has survived a broken home and a "Jennifer Aniston cut" which went wrong and feels sure her hard upbringing will bring the kind of qualities to impress The Leader.
To spice things up a bit, each week the rejected contestant will be placed against a wall and shot by Kim Sung-Il's own specially trained regiment.
Starts November the sixth.

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The Prof
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Postby The Prof » 26 Oct 2006, 23:52

well bumped - this is a great thread.

Bungo the Mungo

Postby Bungo the Mungo » 26 Oct 2006, 23:53

Absolute Fucking Cunt

Channel 4 follows the progress of your headmaster's shopping trip

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The Prof
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Postby The Prof » 26 Oct 2006, 23:58

Absolute Fucking Cunt 2

Channel 4 follows the progress John Coan as he tries to shepherd a group of music internet geeks around the ancient city of Prague.
With hilarious consequences