How do you convince a girl to take it up the ass?

Backslapping time. Well done us. We are fantastic.
Sea Of Tunes

Postby Sea Of Tunes » 27 Sep 2005, 18:40

Biffo the Bear wrote:Its all a mystery to me. why would you assume a woman would want this any mor than you do. I am not keen to pleasured in this way..at all...so why on earth would I think a girl might have different ideas.

Its all about abuse, I fear, altho i know some girls do like it. If they do, i would think it was up to them to innitiate proceedings. Otherwise its all a bit off.


Tastes differ. I like having something there sometimes, I can't help it.

User avatar
Snarfyguy
Dominated by the Obscure
Posts: 53502
Joined: 21 Jul 2003, 19:04
Location: New York

Postby Snarfyguy » 27 Sep 2005, 18:42

capt sword wrote:If not butter then shampoo!


As a sexual lubricant? That doesn't seem right at all.
GoogaMooga wrote: The further away from home you go, the greater the risk of getting stuck there.

capt sword

Postby capt sword » 27 Sep 2005, 18:44

snarfyguy wrote:
capt sword wrote:If not butter then shampoo!


As a sexual lubricant? That doesn't seem right at all.


It's all we had in the house.
Butter is good if you have a rush job on.
You need to take it out of the fridge a couple of hours before applying.
Just smear it round the ass and get to work.
Shampoo was a one off, so may not be suitable for everyone.

User avatar
Poppypoobah
Resident Hotty
Posts: 17501
Joined: 18 Jul 2003, 23:03
Location: Paradise
Contact:

Postby Poppypoobah » 27 Sep 2005, 18:47

snarfyguy wrote:
capt sword wrote:If not butter then shampoo!


As a sexual lubricant? That doesn't seem right at all.
I bet it worked her into a lather.

It probably wasnT any more harmful than sticking a buttered up penis in there?
Last edited by Poppypoobah on 27 Sep 2005, 18:50, edited 1 time in total.

Phil T

Postby Phil T » 27 Sep 2005, 18:48

A very brief cautionary tale: Last year, I was talking to one of our consultants while we were doing a sim. on one of our patients, a woman with a rectal carcinoma.

I asked him what was the biggest factor in these sorts of tumours, thinking he'd say something like "diet". No. He said "sex". And went on to tell me that there was a statistically significant higher percentage of this type of cancer amongst people who (as he put it) "took it up the Gary".

So, all jokes aside, I wouldn't do it for that reason. And also cos it does not appeal to me at all.
Last edited by Phil T on 27 Sep 2005, 18:49, edited 1 time in total.

User avatar
Walk In My Shadow
Hello Laydeez
Posts: 38714
Joined: 23 Jul 2003, 20:02
Location: The Good, the Bad, both ugly
Contact:

Postby Walk In My Shadow » 27 Sep 2005, 18:49

Drug her.


No! Wait! Bang her over the head with a wooden mallet.
Cheaper that way.
Beneluxfunkmeisterlurvegod


Image

User avatar
Muskrat
World's Foremost Authority
Posts: 21397
Joined: 17 Jul 2003, 01:05
Location: Next to the park; across the street from the college; and the freeway at my back
Contact:

Postby Muskrat » 27 Sep 2005, 18:53

Sutekh wrote:A very brief cautionary tale: Last year, I was talking to one of our consultants while we were doing a sim. on one of our patients, a woman with a rectal carcinoma.

I asked him what was the biggest factor in these sorts of tumours, thinking he'd say something like "diet". No. He said "sex". And went on to tell me that there was a statistically significant higher percentage of this type of cancer amongst people who (as he put it) "took it up the Gary".

So, all jokes aside, I wouldn't do it for that reason. And also cos it does not appeal to me at all.


Some further substantiation.
Things that a fella can't forget...

Lord Rother wrote: I’m with Googs.

User avatar
Poppypoobah
Resident Hotty
Posts: 17501
Joined: 18 Jul 2003, 23:03
Location: Paradise
Contact:

Postby Poppypoobah » 27 Sep 2005, 19:14

Sutekh wrote:A very brief cautionary tale: Last year, I was talking to one of our consultants while we were doing a sim. on one of our patients, a woman with a rectal carcinoma.

I asked him what was the biggest factor in these sorts of tumours, thinking he'd say something like "diet". No. He said "sex". And went on to tell me that there was a statistically significant higher percentage of this type of cancer amongst people who (as he put it) "took it up the Gary".

So, all jokes aside, I wouldn't do it for that reason. And also cos it does not appeal to me at all.
After doing a bit of research it looks like there is a higher incidence of cancer in men who take it up the bum bareback and then they found a direct correlation between these men and cervical cancer in women due to having the HPV virus. The guys with rectal cancer had HPV too.

Lesson there is safe sex, it's not the act of bum love that causes cancer, it's the fact that these people had HPV (genetal warts).

Phil T

Postby Phil T » 27 Sep 2005, 19:20

Hotsie wrote:
Sutekh wrote:A very brief cautionary tale: Last year, I was talking to one of our consultants while we were doing a sim. on one of our patients, a woman with a rectal carcinoma.

I asked him what was the biggest factor in these sorts of tumours, thinking he'd say something like "diet". No. He said "sex". And went on to tell me that there was a statistically significant higher percentage of this type of cancer amongst people who (as he put it) "took it up the Gary".

So, all jokes aside, I wouldn't do it for that reason. And also cos it does not appeal to me at all.
After doing a bit of research it looks like there is a higher incidence of cancer in men who take it up the bum bareback and then they found a direct correlation between these men and cervical cancer in women due to having the HPV virus. The guys with rectal cancer had HPV too.

Lesson there is safe sex, it's not the act of bum love that causes cancer, it's the fact that these people had HPV (genetal warts).


Actually, I put something along those lines to David the consultant and he said it was due to the physical abuse of the area (ie the rectum tears very easily) rather than some sort of retrovirus thing, as I suggested to him, though he did suggest once or twice wouldn't do any harm whereas doing it repeatedly was the real danger.

User avatar
andymacandy
"Liberal Airhead"
Posts: 30035
Joined: 18 Jul 2003, 18:26
Location: MacAndys Farm

Postby andymacandy » 27 Sep 2005, 19:25

Hypothetically like, one should not expect one's partner to do stuff one isnt prepared to do oneself.
So perhaps your friend might like to raise the subject by asking his dearly beloved if she fancied tickling his prostate for him.
Breaks the ice, so to speak.
That way if its obviously hugely pleasurable,she might feel inclined to try for herself.
Bless the weather.......Image

User avatar
andymacandy
"Liberal Airhead"
Posts: 30035
Joined: 18 Jul 2003, 18:26
Location: MacAndys Farm

Postby andymacandy » 27 Sep 2005, 19:26

The Smamfy wrote:Image

Image
Bless the weather.......Image

User avatar
The Slider
Self-Aggrandising Cock
Posts: 48262
Joined: 16 Jul 2003, 19:05
Location: I'm only here for the sneer
Contact:

Postby The Slider » 27 Sep 2005, 19:27

Fucking amateurs. :roll:
Complete Ramones Mp3 set on its way

User avatar
andymacandy
"Liberal Airhead"
Posts: 30035
Joined: 18 Jul 2003, 18:26
Location: MacAndys Farm

Postby andymacandy » 27 Sep 2005, 19:28

The Slider wrote:Fucking amateurs. :roll:

As opposed to professionals?
Bless the weather.......Image

User avatar
Walk In My Shadow
Hello Laydeez
Posts: 38714
Joined: 23 Jul 2003, 20:02
Location: The Good, the Bad, both ugly
Contact:

Postby Walk In My Shadow » 27 Sep 2005, 19:44

neverknows wrote:
andymacandy wrote:Hypothetically like, one should not expect one's partner to do stuff one isnt prepared to do oneself.
So perhaps your friend might like to raise the subject by asking his dearly beloved if she fancied tickling his prostate for him.
Breaks the ice, so to speak.
That way if its obviously hugely pleasurable,she might feel inclined to try for herself.

That's right, and the same goes for blow jobs: don't expect one if you have never given one.



:shock:
Beneluxfunkmeisterlurvegod


Image

Sea Of Tunes

Postby Sea Of Tunes » 27 Sep 2005, 19:46

It is sheer nonsense (in the biological sense) that anal sex can cause cancer. I fear that a lot of layman misunderstandings and folk tales are to blame for this. What is true is this:
The anal tract is hugely arteriated, and as such is a candidate for infections and contaminations. But do realise this: when you defecate, a large amount and mass passes the tract. Therefore, if hygiene is respected, it is simply not possible that inserting a penis and taking care of each other would lead to cancer. Of course an abnormal large male organ and a very tight female sphincter region do not go well together, but that is equally true in all other forms of contact.
Yup, if you are cursed with a venereal disease of whatever kind, anal contact is much more dangerous than vaginal contact. But do not blame the act itself.
Love, care, and free will are of the essence here.

User avatar
Poppypoobah
Resident Hotty
Posts: 17501
Joined: 18 Jul 2003, 23:03
Location: Paradise
Contact:

Postby Poppypoobah » 27 Sep 2005, 19:50

neverknows wrote:
andymacandy wrote:Hypothetically like, one should not expect one's partner to do stuff one isnt prepared to do oneself.
So perhaps your friend might like to raise the subject by asking his dearly beloved if she fancied tickling his prostate for him.
Breaks the ice, so to speak.
That way if its obviously hugely pleasurable,she might feel inclined to try for herself.

That's right, and the same goes for blow jobs: don't expect one if you have never given one.
If you ever leave your lovely partner, would you marry me? :wink:

K

Postby K » 27 Sep 2005, 19:51

neverknows wrote:
andymacandy wrote:Hypothetically like, one should not expect one's partner to do stuff one isnt prepared to do oneself.
So perhaps your friend might like to raise the subject by asking his dearly beloved if she fancied tickling his prostate for him.
Breaks the ice, so to speak.
That way if its obviously hugely pleasurable,she might feel inclined to try for herself.

That's right, and the same goes for blow jobs: don't expect one if you have never given one.


Hmmm. I've only ever given myself one. Does that count?

User avatar
andymacandy
"Liberal Airhead"
Posts: 30035
Joined: 18 Jul 2003, 18:26
Location: MacAndys Farm

Postby andymacandy » 27 Sep 2005, 19:53

Hotsie wrote:
neverknows wrote:
andymacandy wrote:Hypothetically like, one should not expect one's partner to do stuff one isnt prepared to do oneself.
So perhaps your friend might like to raise the subject by asking his dearly beloved if she fancied tickling his prostate for him.
Breaks the ice, so to speak.
That way if its obviously hugely pleasurable,she might feel inclined to try for herself.

That's right, and the same goes for blow jobs: don't expect one if you have never given one.
If you ever leave your lovely partner, would you marry me? :wink:

Image
How soon they forget.................... :cry:

:wink:
Bless the weather.......Image

User avatar
Diamond Dog
"Self Quoter" Extraordinaire.
Posts: 69577
Joined: 16 Jul 2003, 21:04
Location: High On Poachers Hill

Postby Diamond Dog » 27 Sep 2005, 19:56

Hotsie wrote:
neverknows wrote:
andymacandy wrote:Hypothetically like, one should not expect one's partner to do stuff one isnt prepared to do oneself.
So perhaps your friend might like to raise the subject by asking his dearly beloved if she fancied tickling his prostate for him.
Breaks the ice, so to speak.
That way if its obviously hugely pleasurable,she might feel inclined to try for herself.

That's right, and the same goes for blow jobs: don't expect one if you have never given one.
If you ever leave your lovely partner, would you marry me? :wink:


Are you a tranny? :shock:
Nicotine, valium, vicadin, marijuana, ecstasy, and alcohol -
Cocaine

User avatar
andymacandy
"Liberal Airhead"
Posts: 30035
Joined: 18 Jul 2003, 18:26
Location: MacAndys Farm

Postby andymacandy » 27 Sep 2005, 19:56

Diamond Dog wrote:
Hotsie wrote:
neverknows wrote:
andymacandy wrote:Hypothetically like, one should not expect one's partner to do stuff one isnt prepared to do oneself.
So perhaps your friend might like to raise the subject by asking his dearly beloved if she fancied tickling his prostate for him.
Breaks the ice, so to speak.
That way if its obviously hugely pleasurable,she might feel inclined to try for herself.

That's right, and the same goes for blow jobs: don't expect one if you have never given one.
If you ever leave your lovely partner, would you marry me? :wink:


Are you a tranny? :shock:

Gulp! :shock:
Okay, wrong choice of words................
Bless the weather.......Image


Return to “Classic Threads & Treasury of Mirth”