ASK JEFF K!

Backslapping time. Well done us. We are fantastic.
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yomptepi
BCB thumbscrew of Justice
Posts: 36415
Joined: 16 Jul 2003, 17:57
Location: well

Postby yomptepi » 28 Apr 2005, 20:14

Dear jeff.

I have been bored and restless for two or three weeks now, and despite trying my best to feighn an interest in several things, and keepimg myself more that occupied, I just dont seem to be scratching that old itch any more. can you suggest a few excercises that will reawaken my will to live.

yours

a bear.
You don't like me...do you?

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Snarfyguy
Dominated by the Obscure
Posts: 53502
Joined: 21 Jul 2003, 19:04
Location: New York

Postby Snarfyguy » 28 Apr 2005, 20:18

Dear Jeff,

Please rank these Crispy Ambulance albums in order of quality and include a capsule review for each. Many thanks in advance.

Plateau Phase
Scissorgun
Fin
Frozen Blood
Accessory After the Fact
Powder Blind Dream
Alma Mater

PS - Don't let me down here, Jeff. I'm counting on you. :x
GoogaMooga wrote: The further away from home you go, the greater the risk of getting stuck there.

Sea Of Tunes

Postby Sea Of Tunes » 28 Apr 2005, 20:19

Dear Jeff -
I have a certain problem regarding opening new CDs. They could get scratched, you know. So oftentimes I leave them shrinkwrapped. Or buy two copies, one to play and one to stay pristine and collectible.
Should I see a shrink?
Oh yes, every time I go to the record store I must browse the racks with my favourite artists, to see whether everything is available (otherwise I warn the owner), and to put them in the right order, best CDs first.
Am I unwell?

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Walk In My Shadow
Hello Laydeez
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Postby Walk In My Shadow » 28 Apr 2005, 20:19

Dear Jeff,

Can you enlighten us as to which Boards we are supposed to be visiting these days.

Thank you,

A fan
Beneluxfunkmeisterlurvegod


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marios

Postby marios » 28 Apr 2005, 20:22

Dear Jeff,


what's the best band in the whole wide world?


Marios

010101010101
Stat Boy
Posts: 12703
Joined: 16 Jul 2003, 19:23

Postby 010101010101 » 28 Apr 2005, 20:25

Dear Jeff

Your taste is obviously exemplary, congrats on your Cup win.

I would just like to enquire as to when you were sending me the Foreigner mp3 collection you promised.

Cheers mate

The Modernist

Postby The Modernist » 28 Apr 2005, 20:25

Dear Jeff

You may remember the tragic story of my collapsing shelf. What type of screws would you recommend I use to stop this happening in the future. Given your tastes in "heavy" music I assume you have very strong shelfs.
Please help me. Thanks in advance.

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Pablo the Donkey
Posts: 52
Joined: 07 Oct 2003, 21:10
Location: Southern Spain.

Postby Pablo the Donkey » 28 Apr 2005, 20:26

Señor Jeff

For many years poor Pablo dream of snowshoes but not know best ones to buy. What you think? Nike Snowmaster, Adidas Blizzardbuster or Marks and Spencers Green Flash?

Many thanks, Señor

Pablo
dreaming of snowshoes

The Modernist

Postby The Modernist » 28 Apr 2005, 20:31

I suggest you show your respect to our guru by changing your name. Don't live in the past when the future is Jeff.

sensi

Postby sensi » 28 Apr 2005, 20:32

Dear Jeff

I don't need to seek your advice because you had no Pearl Jam in your choices all the way down the line...so you are clearly mad and I'm a trillion times better than you could ever dream of being,

Yours smugly

Sensi

Sea Of Tunes

Postby Sea Of Tunes » 28 Apr 2005, 20:34

Jeff -
how would you like:

Mahattama Bhaghatvittayamayama Karamtijuana-Kama Sutra

as my new name, in your devotion?

The Modernist

Postby The Modernist » 28 Apr 2005, 20:34

sensemeliawopnibop wrote:Dear Jeff

I don't need to seek your advice because you had no Pearl Jam in your choices all the way down the line...so you are clearly mad and I'm a trillion times better than you could ever dream of being,

Yours smugly

Sensi


You are an enemy of the state and a subversive to boot! Stop ruining our utopia with your corrupt ideas or you will pay the consequences!

Sea Of Tunes

Postby Sea Of Tunes » 28 Apr 2005, 20:35

LeModerniste Jeff K wrote:
sensemeliawopnibop wrote:Dear Jeff

I don't need to seek your advice because you had no Pearl Jam in your choices all the way down the line...so you are clearly mad and I'm a trillion times better than you could ever dream of being,

Yours smugly

Sensi


You are an enemy of the state and a subversive to boot! Stop ruining our utopia with your corrupt ideas or you will pay the consequences!


Yup. Stop the heretics. Bring on the Wicker Man!

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Walk In My Shadow
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Postby Walk In My Shadow » 28 Apr 2005, 20:36

TheBoyJeff K wrote:
LeModerniste Jeff K wrote:
You are an enemy of the state and a subversive to boot! Stop ruining our utopia with your corrupt ideas or you will pay the consequences!


leave her, Jeff. she's not worth it.



Yeah Jeff, what Jeff said.
Beneluxfunkmeisterlurvegod


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Matt Wilson
Psychedelic Cowpunk
Posts: 32510
Joined: 16 Jul 2003, 20:18
Location: Edge of a continent

Postby Matt Wilson » 28 Apr 2005, 20:37

Dear Jeff,

I can't seem to pull my head out of my ass no matter how hard I try. I must have stuck it up there years ago before it swelled with self importance to the point where it got stuck.

The one thing which gives me satisfaction is that no one on BCB knows my head's up my ass. They all think I'm a friggin' genius--especially Slider, Yomp, Jimmy Jazz, hell, the whole European section!

What should I do?

signed, a worried mind.

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the masked man
Schadenfreude
Posts: 27074
Joined: 21 Jul 2003, 12:29
Location: Peterborough

Postby the masked man » 28 Apr 2005, 20:41

Dear Jeff,

Who did put the bomp in the bomp-ti-bomp-ti-bomp?

Yours,

a worried admirer.

The Modernist

Postby The Modernist » 28 Apr 2005, 20:42

Walk In Jeff K's Shadow wrote:
TheBoyJeff K wrote:
LeModerniste Jeff K wrote:
You are an enemy of the state and a subversive to boot! Stop ruining our utopia with your corrupt ideas or you will pay the consequences!


leave her, Jeff. she's not worth it.



Yeah Jeff, what Jeff said.


Sorry Jeff, it's just I get upset when non-believers spread their filth and heresy.
I have had a psychic communication from Jeff telling us how to convert these heretics, we should all whistle Motor Away by Guided By Voices simultaneously in five minutes. Then we shall find a new dawn.

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Walk In My Shadow
Hello Laydeez
Posts: 38713
Joined: 23 Jul 2003, 20:02
Location: The Good, the Bad, both ugly
Contact:

Postby Walk In My Shadow » 28 Apr 2005, 20:45

LeModerniste Jeff K wrote:
Walk In Jeff K's Shadow wrote:
TheBoyJeff K wrote:
LeModerniste Jeff K wrote:
You are an enemy of the state and a subversive to boot! Stop ruining our utopia with your corrupt ideas or you will pay the consequences!


leave her, Jeff. she's not worth it.



Yeah Jeff, what Jeff said.


Sorry Jeff, it's just I get upset when non-believers spread their filth and heresy.
I have had a psychic communication from Jeff telling us how to convert these heretics, we should all whistle Motor Away by Guided By Voices simultaneously in five minutes. Then we shall find a new dawn.


Is it OK if I whistle Airport by the Motors Jeff?
Beneluxfunkmeisterlurvegod


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marios

Postby marios » 28 Apr 2005, 20:46

LeModerniste Jeff K wrote:
Walk In Jeff K's Shadow wrote:
TheBoyJeff K wrote:
LeModerniste Jeff K wrote:
You are an enemy of the state and a subversive to boot! Stop ruining our utopia with your corrupt ideas or you will pay the consequences!


leave her, Jeff. she's not worth it.



Yeah Jeff, what Jeff said.


Sorry Jeff, it's just I get upset when non-believers spread their filth and heresy.
I have had a psychic communication from Jeff telling us how to convert these heretics, we should all whistle Motor Away by Guided By Voices simultaneously in five minutes. Then we shall find a new dawn.


But Jeff, wouldn't you say that such tactics make us look like a cult? Let someone else handle our PR from now on, please.

The Modernist

Postby The Modernist » 28 Apr 2005, 20:50

marios jeff k wrote:
But Jeff, wouldn't you say that such tactics make us look like a cult? Let someone else handle our PR from now on, please.

:evil:

I hope you're not a Judas Iscariot in the making Jeff?


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