Delicatessens

in reality, all of this has been a total load of old bollocks
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Minnie the Minx
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Delicatessens

Postby Minnie the Minx » 17 Jan 2021, 18:25

We hadn't been to our favourite place since March 2020 and I was a little worried about it, as it is an old family business in a rapidly gentrifying area and I thought Covid would be the end. I went yesterday and needn't have worried, as the queue for sandwiches went out the shop. Delis are great, aren't they? It's the food equivalent of being given a key to the dressing up box from the pantomime. You haven't got a clue what a lot of the stuff is intended for, but it'll be fun giving it a go! My mum used to take me to the delis in the old Bradford market to get her various eastern Europe treasures but I never had time to properly snoop around. Walls of gherkin jars shimmered like fish and someone stood on permanent carving duty. I liked the sound of the rrrrrip of paper before some foodstuff got slapped in it and wrapped up.

Our deli has a stack of shelves behind the desk where all the soft flatbreads live. Some of them are so soft they start to flop over the shelf edge like Dali's melting clock. No matter what time you buy them, they are always warm. Their sandwich serving system has always been a bit of a free for all, with one person scratching the order on the back of a paper bag, handing it to someone who disappears behind large metal swinging doors, a penultimate, different handler who returns your order and then the person that you pay. In Covid times, the confusion has grown because all four people stand behind the counter with their masks on, and you approach each one thinking they are "the one" only for them to raise their eyebrows and point with a jerked thumb to the person next to them.

Yesterday I came home with various spinach pies, some beautiful flatbread, sesame crackers, falafel mix, big tins of juicy broad beans, pots of fresh hummus, tabbouleh, cucumber salads, the word's best spring water (Jermuk), HP SAUCE x 2, and harissa. Experience has told me that all packet soups, even those that look delicious, are to be avoided so I did. I'm not crazy about olives and avoided those buckets but shitting hell, the nuts. The store was too small to feel "safe" about hanging around for long and that's the only thing that stopped me buying more roasted sunflower seeds than we would ever need.

Here's to delicatessens!
You come at the Queen, you best not miss.

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Someone in your line of work usually as their own man cave aka the shed we're they can potter around fixing stuff or something don't they?


Flower wrote:I just did a google search.

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Re: Delicatessens

Postby GoogaMooga » 17 Jan 2021, 18:56

Love the delis. I don't like to cook from scratch, so it's eat out, ready meals, or deli meals. If I didn't collect, I'd buy from the delis every day, but as it is, I have to pick at those microwaved ready meals in between.
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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Deebank » 17 Jan 2021, 19:49

I have a script for a detective show pilot in development.

Our hero is a deli-based sleuth who solves savoury snack-related crimes it is called Cole’s Law...!










I know :oops:
I've been talking about writing a book - 25 years of TEFL - for a few years now. I've got it in me.

Paid anghofio fod dy galon yn y chwyldro

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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Flower » 17 Jan 2021, 20:23

Deebank wrote:I have a script for a detective show pilot in development.

Our hero is a deli-based sleuth who solves savoury snack-related crimes it is called Cole’s Law...!


I know :oops:


Sounds like that old show Slaw & Order

Sorry .. a bit cornbeefy.
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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Flower » 17 Jan 2021, 20:26

If love could've saved you, you would've lived forever.

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Re: Delicatessens

Postby John aka Josh » 17 Jan 2021, 21:06

Minnie the Minx wrote:We hadn't been to our favourite place since March 2020 and I was a little worried about it, as it is an old family business in a rapidly gentrifying area and I thought Covid would be the end. I went yesterday and needn't have worried, as the queue for sandwiches went out the shop. Delis are great, aren't they? It's the food equivalent of being given a key to the dressing up box from the pantomime. You haven't got a clue what a lot of the stuff is intended for, but it'll be fun giving it a go! My mum used to take me to the delis in the old Bradford market to get her various eastern Europe treasures but I never had time to properly snoop around. Walls of gherkin jars shimmered like fish and someone stood on permanent carving duty. I liked the sound of the rrrrrip of paper before some foodstuff got slapped in it and wrapped up.

Our deli has a stack of shelves behind the desk where all the soft flatbreads live. Some of them are so soft they start to flop over the shelf edge like Dali's melting clock. No matter what time you buy them, they are always warm. Their sandwich serving system has always been a bit of a free for all, with one person scratching the order on the back of a paper bag, handing it to someone who disappears behind large metal swinging doors, a penultimate, different handler who returns your order and then the person that you pay. In Covid times, the confusion has grown because all four people stand behind the counter with their masks on, and you approach each one thinking they are "the one" only for them to raise their eyebrows and point with a jerked thumb to the person next to them.

Yesterday I came home with various spinach pies, some beautiful flatbread, sesame crackers, falafel mix, big tins of juicy broad beans, pots of fresh hummus, tabbouleh, cucumber salads, the word's best spring water (Jermuk), HP SAUCE x 2, and harissa. Experience has told me that all packet soups, even those that look delicious, are to be avoided so I did. I'm not crazy about olives and avoided those buckets but shitting hell, the nuts. The store was too small to feel "safe" about hanging around for long and that's the only thing that stopped me buying more roasted sunflower seeds than we would ever need.

Here's to delicatessens!




Enjoyed reading this, especially your memories of Old Bradford Market. Took me back to Saturdays in the 60s, going into Reading, always going to the Continental Shop, Dad buying Polish bread and usually proper frankfurters, though in the 70s he tended to get kabonos more. Which ever sausage it was we'd have it for Sunday breakfast. The bread was delicious, a firm wholemeal with caraway seed. Even with the influx of Polish shops I've still not managed to buy any exactly the same. The sausages and salamis hanging above the counter were intriguing with the difference in colour, thickness, the marbled surfaces - magical. Just walking into the store and inhaling the glorious fragrance - that intoxicating smell of pickles, cheese, breads and nuts was a weekly highlight.
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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Minnie the Minx » 17 Jan 2021, 21:39

:D
What nationality was/ is your Dad?
You come at the Queen, you best not miss.

Dr Markus wrote:
Someone in your line of work usually as their own man cave aka the shed we're they can potter around fixing stuff or something don't they?


Flower wrote:I just did a google search.

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Re: Delicatessens

Postby John aka Josh » 17 Jan 2021, 22:52

Dad was Polish.
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Minnie the Minx
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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Minnie the Minx » 18 Jan 2021, 00:05

Right. I know what you mean about the sausage - there is a very distinct kind that you probably used to have which Mum used to get too - vaguely smokey. Quite a tough skin that went ‘ping’ when you bit it! When I stopped eating meat and started only having the sauerkraut at the Estonian functions, there was always some sausage at the bottom that someone threw in ‘for luck’ :D

:x
You come at the Queen, you best not miss.

Dr Markus wrote:
Someone in your line of work usually as their own man cave aka the shed we're they can potter around fixing stuff or something don't they?


Flower wrote:I just did a google search.

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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Jimbo » 18 Jan 2021, 02:59

We used to eat kosher hot dogs, french fries and cream soda (for the adults Dr. Brown's Cel-Ray, celery flavored pop) at Satz's Delicatessen. The sign was neon. It was a kosher deli with no pork goods, of course, but salamis and such hanging from the ceiling.

In the close but no cigar department, the sign in the "deli" section in many Japanese supermarkets where prepared foods are sold is often written "Daily Foods".
kath wrote: *which is the real reason he can fucque off and rot for the rest of time.

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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Samoan » 18 Jan 2021, 11:54

There's nothing quite like Polish cheesecake and Pączki: also Chrzan (Polish horseradish sauce)
I haven't been in the locality of my usual deli. I do hope it's surviving.
Nonsense to the aggressiveness, I've seen more aggression on the my little pony message board......I mean I was told.

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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Flower » 18 Jan 2021, 12:37

Jimbo wrote:We used to eat kosher hot dogs, french fries and cream soda (for the adults Dr. Brown's Cel-Ray, celery flavored pop) at Satz's Delicatessen. The sign was neon. It was a kosher deli with no pork goods, of course, but salamis and such hanging from the ceiling.

In the close but no cigar department, the sign in the "deli" section in many Japanese supermarkets where prepared foods are sold is often written "Daily Foods".


I've always hated Dr. Brown's Cel-Ray soda.

My deli favorites are corned beef, brisket or salami sandwiches. Other deli treats are kasha varnishes, knishes (both square and round), mushroom and barley salad and noodle pudding.
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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Jimbo » 18 Jan 2021, 13:29

Flower wrote:
Jimbo wrote:We used to eat kosher hot dogs, french fries and cream soda (for the adults Dr. Brown's Cel-Ray, celery flavored pop) at Satz's Delicatessen. The sign was neon. It was a kosher deli with no pork goods, of course, but salamis and such hanging from the ceiling.

In the close but no cigar department, the sign in the "deli" section in many Japanese supermarkets where prepared foods are sold is often written "Daily Foods".


I've always hated Dr. Brown's Cel-Ray soda.

My deli favorites are corned beef, brisket or salami sandwiches. Other deli treats are kasha varnishes, knishes (both square and round), mushroom and barley salad and noodle pudding.


Ever go to Wolfies or Rascal House in Miami? The lines to get in were something. On the table were two buckets, one with pickled cucumbers and the other with pickled green tomatoes. Went not too long ago the the last extant member of the chain, Wolfies on South Beach and man was it sad ... But fret not there are these bagel joints all over South Florida which mimic the deli restaurants of yore. We took my Japanese father in law to Wolfies promising him the best sandwich he ever had and when the super stuffed corned beef on rye came his first comment was "Too much meat," as if gluttony was a sin or something.
kath wrote: *which is the real reason he can fucque off and rot for the rest of time.

Jimbo wrote: So Kath, put on your puka love beads ... Then go fuque yourself.

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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Flower » 18 Jan 2021, 14:16

Yes, I've been to both Wolfies and the Rascal House but it's been many years since I've been in Florida. I haven't seen or thought about "sour tomatoes" or "half sour pickles" in years.

My parents moved to Merrick, N.Y. when I was 12, it had a great Deli that lasted a half dozen years or so and became a great Hunan Restaurant. Merrick also had a great candy store, complete with a soda fountain that became a deli that was called Wolfs or Wolfies but that was after my time.
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Re: Delicatessens

Postby John aka Josh » 18 Jan 2021, 21:05

Minnie the Minx wrote:Right. I know what you mean about the sausage - there is a very distinct kind that you probably used to have which Mum used to get too - vaguely smokey. Quite a tough skin that went ‘ping’ when you bit it! When I stopped eating meat and started only having the sauerkraut at the Estonian functions, there was always some sausage at the bottom that someone threw in ‘for luck’ :D

:x



Yes - and if you were hasty when boiling the skins would split anyway. Been a vegetarian for about 40 years now and some of the sausages are about the only things I've ever missed. The biggest miss though are pickled herrings whether with dill, onion... mouthwateringly great. You're right about the sausage in the sauerkraut!
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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Fonz » 19 Jan 2021, 22:24

Deebank wrote:I have a script for a detective show pilot in development.

Our hero is a deli-based sleuth who solves savoury snack-related crimes it is called Cole’s Law...!










I know :oops:



He’s not your typical alcoholic washout.
For kicks, he likes to slather his genitals in garlic/chickpea paste, and squirt it up his arsehole.








































He’s a hummusexual.
Heyyyy!

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Minnie the Minx
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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Minnie the Minx » 19 Jan 2021, 22:27

:D
You come at the Queen, you best not miss.

Dr Markus wrote:
Someone in your line of work usually as their own man cave aka the shed we're they can potter around fixing stuff or something don't they?


Flower wrote:I just did a google search.

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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Jimbo » 20 Jan 2021, 02:47

Yeah, they're both, but do you think a deli is a place to sit down and eat meaty sandwiches and pickles or a take out place?
kath wrote: *which is the real reason he can fucque off and rot for the rest of time.

Jimbo wrote: So Kath, put on your puka love beads ... Then go fuque yourself.

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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Deebank » 20 Jan 2021, 09:54

Fonz wrote:
Deebank wrote:I have a script for a detective show pilot in development.

Our hero is a deli-based sleuth who solves savoury snack-related crimes it is called Cole’s Law...!










I know :oops:



He’s not your typical alcoholic washout.
For kicks, he likes to slather his genitals in garlic/chickpea paste, and squirt it up his arsehole.










































He’s a hummusexual.



:? It'll never get the 9pm slot with that backstory.
I've been talking about writing a book - 25 years of TEFL - for a few years now. I've got it in me.

Paid anghofio fod dy galon yn y chwyldro

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Re: Delicatessens

Postby Fonz » 20 Jan 2021, 11:39

Deebank wrote:
Fonz wrote:
Deebank wrote:I have a script for a detective show pilot in development.

Our hero is a deli-based sleuth who solves savoury snack-related crimes it is called Cole’s Law...!










I know :oops:



He’s not your typical alcoholic washout.
For kicks, he likes to slather his genitals in garlic/chickpea paste, and squirt it up his arsehole.










































He’s a hummusexual.



:? It'll never get the 9pm slot with that backstory.



First case, investigating the suspicious death of the deli’s (‘Atta’s Deli’) owner, Moysel:














‘Tara, Moysel Atta’
Heyyyy!

"Fonz clearly has no fucks to give. I like the cut of his Cupicidal gib."