"I vont to be alone"

in reality, all of this has been a total load of old bollocks
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GoogaMooga
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"I vont to be alone"

Postby GoogaMooga » 21 Feb 2020, 19:26

Image

Garbo, Salinger, Howard Hughes et al. - I want to join that club. I am 56 years old, and worn out socially. Used to long for company, been through it all, but really I am most relaxed when I am all by myself (cue Rachmaninoff's Piano Concerto no. 2 in C minor).

It's just too much hard work being social and on the ball. And I am not "alone" in feeling that way, nearly half the world's population is introvert. But very few people take that radical step and withdraw. It's risky, what if you become sick, what if you go crazy, what about your old age.

In order to withdraw, you need to at least keep a few contacts. Real loners who die in their apartments, and are only discovered when their rotting corpses' stench fills the stairway and alerts the neighbors, nobody wants to go out that way.

The survival guide for loners:

Keep a few contacts
Make phone calls
If you are on a pension, do volunteer work where you can be by yourself most of the time and come and go as you please (e.g. work in a thrift shop).
Get online, join forums
Immerse yourself in a hobby
Read your books raw
"When the desert comes, people will be sad; just as Cannery Row was sad when all the pilchards were caught and canned and eaten." - John Steinbeck

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Jimbo
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Re: "I vont to be alone"

Postby Jimbo » 22 Feb 2020, 13:27

Just thinking how I need to drink whenever I get together with friends and acquaintances. Not that that drinking and hanging with friends isn't a hell of a lot of fun sometimes but that's how it always seems to go. I see how the internet is a big aid to the modern hermit. And canned food is a must have. The variety is staggering and no need to cook. Don't even need a can opener nowadays! All you need is a spoon, and maybe a bowl. Good luck, Googs!
You don't have to be smart to see how fucked up this shit is. Jimmy Dore

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Flower
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Re: "I vont to be alone"

Postby Flower » 22 Feb 2020, 14:12

GM ~ Get a small pet. A turtle or even goldfish. Something to give additional reason for getting up in the morning.
If love could've saved you, you would've lived forever.

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Matt Wilson
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Re: "I vont to be alone"

Postby Matt Wilson » 22 Feb 2020, 16:33

I'm probably about half introvert and half extrovert, depends on the mood. I almost never want to be the center of attention in a crowd anymore though, and would much rather have someone else do the talking. I'm also way better at one-on-one conversations than working a room. I'm alone for half the week usually, when my kids are with their mother. Currently, my oldest isn't getting along with her mom, so she stays with me. I do get lonely, and I'm sure I didn't think my life would turn out this way when I was younger and always had a girlfriend, but I'm not gonna settle for just anyone either. My last relationship ended because neither one of us was in love with the other. I guess I'd rather be alone than be with someone just to be in a relationship.

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GoogaMooga
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Re: "I vont to be alone"

Postby GoogaMooga » 22 Feb 2020, 17:47

I was a bit nervous after posting, because I was not sure how it would go down, but you guys seem to understand. Thanks for your input! :D

Flower - no need for a pet. CDs are my pets. ;)
"When the desert comes, people will be sad; just as Cannery Row was sad when all the pilchards were caught and canned and eaten." - John Steinbeck

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The Modernist
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Re: "I vont to be alone"

Postby The Modernist » 28 Feb 2020, 08:30

I can understand those hermit tendencies and have quite a few myself, but I don't think social isolation is healthy for anyone. Try and go out and join something even if it's only for a few hours a week. You'll feel better for it.

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GoogaMooga
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Re: "I vont to be alone"

Postby GoogaMooga » 28 Feb 2020, 16:08

The Modernist wrote:I can understand those hermit tendencies and have quite a few myself, but I don't think social isolation is healthy for anyone. Try and go out and join something even if it's only for a few hours a week. You'll feel better for it.


Oh, I do. I am a volunteer at a large thrift shop about twice a week. I am in charge of - you'll never guess - music and film. I am also good on the phone, and meet up with a few close friends a few times a year. Also, people in my block, even if it's only a brief chat on the footpath or on the stairs.
"When the desert comes, people will be sad; just as Cannery Row was sad when all the pilchards were caught and canned and eaten." - John Steinbeck

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Flower
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Re: "I vont to be alone"

Postby Flower » 28 Feb 2020, 19:30

GM ~ It's often the small interactions that "matter" the most in this world. I live near a day care and the kid's playground was being "fixed" so the teachers (several who are friends) would take them out for walks during the school day. One day I was wearing a Flash t-shirt and this little boy called out to me and told me that he loved the Flash. The next day I noticed his Superman hat and commented upon it. He then proudly told the rest of his class that I was his friend. Since I always wave to all the kids, they all claimed me for their friend. Then the little boy told them all that I was his "best friend" and they all claimed the same. I told them that they were all my best friends which made everyone happy.

After that, I would see the kids on almost a daily basis. We would all exchange names, chat (they would all talk at once), talk about our pets and other things.

One morning, I was gardening when one of the little boys and his mother pasted my house, we all waved and said "Good Morning." When they were walking down the street, the little boy said to his mother with joy .. "Oh Mommy! I saw my friend, I saw my friend!." I started to cry.

So I guess that the point to this story is that it's the small interactions that touch us the most. I was sorry when the playground was finished.
If love could've saved you, you would've lived forever.

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GoogaMooga
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Re: "I vont to be alone"

Postby GoogaMooga » 28 Feb 2020, 21:28

Nice little anecdote, Flower, which really proves your point. :) The art of stimulating, intellectual conversation is kind of lost now, anyway, much like the art of letter writing. A thing of the past - 19th century, really. Nowadays it's texting and instagram and thumbs up or down. I just like to go off and do my own thing.
"When the desert comes, people will be sad; just as Cannery Row was sad when all the pilchards were caught and canned and eaten." - John Steinbeck