Friends, enemies, acquaintances

in reality, all of this has been a total load of old bollocks
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hippopotamus
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Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby hippopotamus » 02 Feb 2018, 11:04

Friends

Do you have a best friend?

How often do you see them/speak to them?

Describe a scenario that encapsulates your friendship.


Enemies

Anyone you hate but have to spend time with?

Do you do anything to show them you don't like them?


Acquaintances


Any acquaintances who act like you are good friends?

Any acquaintances you wish you were really good friends with?
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Dr Markus
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Re: Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby Dr Markus » 02 Feb 2018, 12:50

Friends

Do you have a best friend?
A few if i'm being honest. We have a group of about 13 friends that are pretty close and all have known each other since we were about 13. It's weird how we all stuck together but i'm glad we did. I have two friends that I confide to a lot. So I suppose I have two best friends.

How often do you see them/speak to them?
Usually once every two weeks or so, but whatapps is a godsend. In that regard we talk to each other ever day. Best invention ever, whatapp, then maybe the wheel.

Describe a scenario that encapsulates your friendship.
I plead the fifth :?


Enemies

Anyone you hate but have to spend time with?
Dislike rather than hate. Hate, I've learned is a strong word that can be over used some times.

Do you do anything to show them you don't like them?
Depends what mood i'm in to be honest. If i'm in a good mood i'll probably tolerate them until I see a get out. Otherwise i'm be politely curt (contradiction in terms I know) and just get the fuck outta there.

Acquaintances
Aye people I met now and again, folk that wouldn't first come to mind for going for a pint for example.

Acquaintances
Any acquaintances who act like you are good friends?
Yeah Coan, give me some space big lad. :roll:

Any acquaintances you wish you were really good friends with?
Not really, I've enough to keep me going as it is.
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Jimbo
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Re: Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby Jimbo » 02 Feb 2018, 16:54

They just left our home after an evening of tea, cake and chat. It's along story but my wife and I have known John since our Seattle days 35 years ago and his wife was a teacher at the same school where he and I used to team teach. And amazingly they live a a few minutes away by foot from here. We see them often. We went to Fuji Rock with John and to Asagiri Jam (Fuji's autumn version) with them both sleeping in the same tent. My family back home always ask about John like he is a family member. Our son is older but he and their son are like brothers. We planned a future camping trip tonight. Best friends.

Enemies. None.

Acquaintances: Plenty.
Gadfly

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Toby
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Re: Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby Toby » 02 Feb 2018, 17:05

It would be quite cool to have an enemy.

I don't like some people, but an enemy is different - that's like a whole paradigm of activity you'd enter into. An enemy requires action against them - surveillance, counter-insurgency, actively trying to bring them down.

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sloopjohnc
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Re: Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby sloopjohnc » 02 Feb 2018, 17:43

Friends

Do you have a best friend?

I have four friends I've known all the way back to kindergarten through third grade (ages 5 to 8).

How often do you see them/speak to them?

I see one every three or four months and for the others it can a year or more. We used to try and meet up at a friend's cabin every year, but he sold it so we don't.

Describe a scenario that encapsulates your friendship.

A few times where we'll laugh at something shared between us where a third or outside person thinks we're whackadoo.

Enemies

Anyone you hate but have to spend time with?

My sister-in-law, but that's only once a year for a few hours.

Do you do anything to show them you don't like them?

I ignore people I don't like. It's not worth getting upset about so I cut 'em out like tumors. Some people like to upset or thrive on confrontation. I don't consider myself one of those kind of people. I may talk a lil' smack, even on here, but it's good natured. Or meant to be.


Acquaintances

Any acquaintances who act like you are good friends?

I have a friend, who's really barely more than an acquaintance, yet he considers me one of his best friends. He's a fairly solitary guy and doesn't have many other friends so considers when we get together as something more than I do.

When we meet, he'll say stuff like, "You know me too well," or "I can't fool you," and I wonder what the hell he's talking about.

Any acquaintances you wish you were really good friends with?

No.
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WG Kaspar
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Re: Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby WG Kaspar » 02 Feb 2018, 18:58

Friends

Do you have a best friend?
I suppose I do, but it's getting harder to define what a best friend is these days and he lives in a different country.

How often do you see them/speak to them?
Whenever I'm back home which is once or twice a year. We talk on our birthdays too.

Describe a scenario that encapsulates your friendship.
Not sure how to answer this. He's my first calling point other than my parents whenever I return home.


Enemies

Anyone you hate but have to spend time with?
Thankfully no, but I had to live with someone I disliked intensely not so long.

Do you do anything to show them you don't like them?
Not really, I just tried to avoid him and when I couldn't I listened patiently until I found an excuse to leave.


Acquaintances


Any acquaintances who act like you are good friends?
Many acquaintances, but am not famous enough so that someone will pretend they're friends with me.

Any acquaintances you wish you were really good friends with?
Sure and am sure that it will happen in due course.
I run out of talent

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hippopotamus
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Re: Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby hippopotamus » 02 Feb 2018, 19:59

Friends

Do you have a best friend?
Definitely.
I've always had best friends, even if it seems a bit childlish to name out loud.

How often do you see them/speak to them?
Everyday. We're both quite busy all the time, and live on opposite ends of the country, so it really surprises me that we do. But she makes me laugh like no other person, and usually whatever is happening she's the person I think would be the best person to tell about it. She's also the lowest maintenance person in the world. Nowadays with all kinds of "chat" facilities, you're supposed to be available every second of the day... she wouldn't mind if I sent her an extremely weird message with no context, and only follow up or reply to hers a week later.

I see her only every few months, but we tend to be planning when next we are going to see each other everyday.

Describe a scenario that encapsulates your friendship.
We were going camping together, just the two of us. She picked me up from the airport and we started our 2-3 hour drive to where we were going to set up camp. She has he oldest car in the world with only a tape player that barely works. She put a Gilbert and Sullivan Operetta into the tape player, and we were singing along and enjoying ourselves WAY too much. So she just turned the volume to the max with a cheeky grin... I THINK looking at me to keep her in check... but instead I just wound down the windows.
The car was shaking with the racket and we were going through a toll booth when the lyrics "BOW, BOW, YE LOWER MIDDLE CLASSES" were booming through the windows. And we both looked at each other with this feeling that we were used to being around people who don't let us get carried away, but neither one of us was equipped to be the adult if we thought it was funny.

Today she asked me out of the blue if we had ever done anything Really illegal together. Both respectable enough citizens in our own way, but together we get up to the strangest things and have no self-restraint.

Enemies

Anyone you hate but have to spend time with?

I usually get on with with most people. There was one nurse, once, that I EXTREMELY didn't get along with, and would Dread having to work with.

Do you do anything to show them you don't like them?

I think I'm thoroughly incapable of hiding my emotions and I really hate that.


Acquaintances


Any acquaintances who act like you are good friends?

Today, this girl I barely knew 15 years ago messaged me asking me how I was doing, where I lived and that we should "catch up". I noticed we had had a similarly strange interaction about 8 years ago too.

We never WERE friends. She was the friend of someone I lived with, whose name i even forget because we weren't friends. It's pretty weird.
This happens to me fairly frequently with male acquaintances (When I think they look through their roster of single females), but in this case... I don't really know. Maybe she's a lesbian, but I seemed to remember her talking about how she was looking for a certain type of guy once. Our mutual acqaintance was a lesbian, but hadn't really admitted it. She would just tell me "How I WISH I was a lesbian, I'd have a different girl every day". * So maybe there's another agenda. Could someone be that lonely that they think of anyone they might have known once to see if they could be friends?

Any acquaintances you wish you were really good friends with?
There's this one girl who was friends with all my friends, but for some reason we never had a lot of time to have our friendship blossom. Then on facebook we will occasionally like all each other's things, or send each other a link. I do sort of wish we could be proper friends.


*When we lived together I found her in my bedroom watching me sleep one morning... so I had to lock the door.
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nev gash wrote:What is point?


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Insouciant Western People
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Re: Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby Insouciant Western People » 07 Feb 2018, 14:10

Friends

Do you have a best friend?

My wife.

I had an extremely close best friend when I was aged from 14 or so, to about 25. But I got married, moved away from the north east and became a parent, and we gradually lost touch. The last time I saw him was in 2004 when I was best man at his wedding, and at the time it felt like we'd drifted apart a lot already, I'm sure he only asked me for old times' sake. I tend to think that if we saw much of each other now, we probably wouldn't get on all that well. I think it was one of those friendships that's dependent on being a certain age, and finding yourself in a particular set of circumstances.


How often do you see them/speak to them?

Every day, on both counts.


Describe a scenario that encapsulates your friendship.

Wandering around a European city, visiting art galleries or museums, and a visit to a nice pub, in the knowledge that we have dinner in a good restaurant to look forward to later.



Enemies

Anyone you hate but have to spend time with?

Yeah a few, but dislike rather than hate. I can't think of anyone in my life at the moment who I hate. As Markus says, it's a strong word.


Do you do anything to show them you don't like them?

No, I'm generally polite, and I really don't like confrontation or awkwardness.



Acquaintances

Any acquaintances who act like you are good friends?

Not really. I'm pretty good at keeping people at a distance when I want to. I could say, slightly ruefully, that there are probably some of my real friends who I'm not that good at keeping in touch with. I'm quite quiet and insular, and keep myself to myself a lot.

A friend was recently quite shocked when I told her that I speak to my parents on the phone only once every couple of weeks, and that I can go months without speaking to my sister. She talks to her mum in Germany every day.


Any acquaintances you wish you were really good friends with?

There are a couple of people I've got to know when I've been working away, who live in different parts of the country or overseas, who I'd like to get to know better and spend more time with.
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The Modernist
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Re: Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby The Modernist » 07 Feb 2018, 14:22

Nick wrote:I had an extremely close best friend when I was aged from 14 or so, to about 25. But I got married, moved away from the north east and became a parent, and we gradually lost touch. The last time I saw him was in 2004 when I was best man at his wedding, and at the time it felt like we'd drifted apart a lot already, I'm sure he only asked me for old times' sake. I tend to think that if we saw much of each other now, we probably wouldn't get on all that well. I think it was one of those friendships that's dependent on being a certain age, and finding yourself in a particular set of circumstances.
.


Obviously I can't speak about you and your mate, but generally I'd disagree with that last part. I think sometimes we believe that all the external things that have happened to us over many decades has made us into a different person, whereas I think, deep down, we remain pretty much the same.
I've had the experience of seeing people I hadn't seen for ten, fifteen or twenty years or more quite often in the last few years ( social media makes it very easy to reacquaint with people who you'd otherwise lose touch with) and I've often been surprised how easily I've been able to slip into an old rapport with people. I probably like some of them more now than I did back then because people generally get nicer and less self-absorbed as they get older ( I think I have anyway).

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Re: Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby sloopjohnc » 07 Feb 2018, 16:45

The Modernist wrote:
Nick wrote:I had an extremely close best friend when I was aged from 14 or so, to about 25. But I got married, moved away from the north east and became a parent, and we gradually lost touch. The last time I saw him was in 2004 when I was best man at his wedding, and at the time it felt like we'd drifted apart a lot already, I'm sure he only asked me for old times' sake. I tend to think that if we saw much of each other now, we probably wouldn't get on all that well. I think it was one of those friendships that's dependent on being a certain age, and finding yourself in a particular set of circumstances.
.


Obviously I can't speak about you and your mate, but generally I'd disagree with that last part. I think sometimes we believe that all the external things that have happened to us over many decades has made us into a different person, whereas I think, deep down, we remain pretty much the same.
I've had the experience of seeing people I hadn't seen for ten, fifteen or twenty years or more quite often in the last few years ( social media makes it very easy to reacquaint with people who you'd otherwise lose touch with) and I've often been surprised how easily I've been able to slip into an old rapport with people. I probably like some of them more now than I did back then because people generally get nicer and less self-absorbed as they get older ( I think I have anyway).


I agree. I've had this happen lots of times where I've hooked up with old friends with decades of not communicating and it's very easy to get back to the start.

I've tried with old work friends and that doesn't work as well when the main camaraderie was bitching about management. If there were other common interests, it works, but still it's harder than with old school friends.
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quix
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Re: Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby quix » 10 Feb 2018, 14:38

There’s a man at work who I cannot stand. He’s an obnoxious, sexist, arrogant, twat. He once tore a strip off me for no reason and I’ve never forgiven him. I wouldn’t say he’s an enemy but I absolutely cannot stand him. Most of the time I just completely and totally ignore him, even in meetings etc, I just totally blank him. Occasionally if I’m feeling petty I let a door slam in his face, which I quite enjoy. Sometimes I delight in the way my frosty behaviour completely perplexes him as he’s obviously forgotten the day he shouted at me and he’s too arrogant to believe he could be so disliked by anyone and he tries to befriend me. I enjoy that too. :oops:

I’ve kept this up for five years now :lol: :oops:

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Diamond Dog
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Re: Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby Diamond Dog » 11 Feb 2018, 13:37

Friends

Do you have a best friend & How often do you see them/speak to them?

Yes I do. We've known eachother since we were six... so fifty years now.... played in the same football teams etc... we have a lot of similar interests but others that are completely the opposite of eachother. We go out for a drink virtually every month, maybe six weeks at a push.

I have a group of between 6-12 old school friends I meet up with three times a year. They're all really good friends.

My present lady is a very very close friend and confidant of mine. Similarly my ex wife was...


Describe a scenario that encapsulates your friendship.

I know that, if I'm in real trouble, he'll be there for me. Simple as that.


Enemies

Anyone you hate but have to spend time with?

Not now. I decided it was pointless having people in my life I don;t like. I'm sure there are many people who consider me an enemy!

Do you do anything to show them you don't like them?

Well completely ignoring them if I bump into them counts here, I guess?


Acquaintances


Any acquaintances who act like you are good friends?

I don;t think so.... interesting question though! There probably is.

Any acquaintances you wish you were really good friends with?

Again I don't think so.... if we wanted it to be, it would have happened.
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Nikki Gradual
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Re: Friends, enemies, acquaintances

Postby Nikki Gradual » 11 Feb 2018, 13:50

Friends

Do you have a best friend?
A few. There are two guys I have known since we started secondary school, well one now - sadly one died last year, I was gutted. Plus one I have known since Uni (probably my male soul-mate) and there was one I have known in the work environment for nearly 20 years and who I thought was a bestie, but it became clear that our friendship was a lot more important to me than to him when he put his corporate ambition above it (and I had done the opposite, friends are more important than status or income to me). Oh well, just goes to show you never really know someone. Plus my brother, which I never thought would happen, but I am closer to him than anyone else. And my first girlfriend, we barely see each other nowadays, but I still love her (no, not that way anymore) because we didn't work as a couple, but we were mega friends for a very long time.

How often do you see them/speak to them?
Occasionally. Two of them, well one now, live in Australia. Don't see any of them that frequently, but my friendships are like that. It's the ability to effortlessly pick up where we left off that defines these friendships for me.

Describe a scenario that encapsulates your friendship.
All the recent biggies were quiet sad, so I'll pass on that.

Enemies

Anyone you hate but have to spend time with?
Not really. There is no one that I can't see the good in eventually. Except Yomp.

Do you do anything to show them you don't like them?
Yes, I am unfailingly polite to them and never rude to them or take the piss. If I am taking the piss out of you, you're all right.

Acquaintances

Any acquaintances who act like you are good friends?
Lots. Mainly people who want to turn a work relationship into a friendship. I can ignore or avoid it pretty easily.

Any acquaintances you wish you were really good friends with?
Nope. Got all the friends I want and need. If one comes along and it just happens, fine, but...
"He's thrown a kettle over a pub; what have you done?"