This month's second underwear question...

[Quaco]

Do you tuck your shirt in between the underwear and trousers, or tuck it into the underwear? There are benefits to each!

[Billybob Dylan]

No tuck for me. I let it all hang out.

[Goat Boy]

I'm not an old man so I leave it hanging out.

[Snarfyguy]

Nobody tucks a shirt into their underpants!

What are you, crazy?

[Uncle Spellbinder]

Nobody tucks a shirt into their underpants!

What are you, crazy?

Listen to Snarfy at this point.

[Footy]

Wear your underpants over your trousers - like Superman.

[harvey k-tel]

Yeah, who the hell other than a lunatic tucks their shirt into their underpants? And what are these 'benefits' you speak of, Quaco?

[BARON CORNY DOG]

I worked with this guy once, he was basically a slob when it came to personal appearance. He couldn't manage to keep his shirts tucked in -- he always wore cheap suits and half of his shirt tail would inevitably be all out there. Anyway, he habitually tucked his shirts into his underwear and so his drawers were always sticking out of his pants. He had a prudish secretary, and she would go apeshit about it and holler at him from across the hall when she saw a flash of white. It was a pretty hilarious recurring scenario. When he was new at the office, I went into his office to talk to him about something. He leaned back in his chair and sat there for awhile as I stood about three feet in front of him, and while I was talking, he totally, blatantly farted and didn't even acknowledge what had just gone down. He was that kind of guy. It happened to other people too. We shared our stories in mutual disbelief. One time we hired this Chinese dude -- he had come to Houston when he was a kid and still spoke with a thick Chinese accent. Anyway, I was in my boss's office talking to the new Chinese Lawyer dude (he was a terrible lawyer) and Mr. Underwear Tucker, who was a profoundly dorky doofus white dude type, came in and introduced himself. When he (quickly) realized that Chinese Lawyer spoke Chinese, he started talking to the dude in Chinese. Like that was a normal thing that goofy white dudes do! Turns out, Underwear Tucker had worked at a "Chinese Law Firm" in Houston and had to have some conversational Chinese as well as a Chinese Name to make his Chinese Clients more comfortable with a dorky white dude who tucked his shirts into his drawers. According to Chinese Lawyer, Underwear Tucker's Chinese name translated roughly to "Learned Horse." This revelation led to gales of laughter.

It was a dysfunctional office. I should tell you about the catholic woman from Corpus Christi who became a Messianic Jew and invented her own office policies and "juiced" her aloe vera plants.

Don't tuck your shirts into your drawers. I know some of y'all do it. You know you do it. Stop.

[Jimbo]

You should know the best method for straightening out your shirt tail and that is to open your fly, shove your fist in and tug the bunched up shirt into place.

[harvey k-tel]

You should know the best method for straightening out your shirt tail and that is to open your fly, shove your fist in and tug the bunched up shirt into place.

Out in the open? In public?

[Jimbo]

You should know the best method for straightening out your shirt tail and that is to open your fly, shove your fist in and tug the bunched up shirt into place.

Out in the open? In public?

Nothing turns 'em on like a man fisting his pants fly.

[Quaco]

Yeah, who the hell other than a lunatic tucks their shirt into their underpants? And what are these 'benefits' you speak of, Quaco?

Well, sometimes it's a hassle to tuck it into one but not into the other, especially if the shirt isn't that long (but isn't the type you would leave hanging out, such as when wearing a suit), so it seems like it would be easier to just tuck the whole thing into the underpants!

[Snarfyguy]

Yeah, who the hell other than a lunatic tucks their shirt into their underpants? And what are these 'benefits' you speak of, Quaco?

Well, sometimes it's a hassle to tuck it into one but not into the other, especially if the shirt isn't that long (but isn't the type you would leave hanging out, such as when wearing a suit), so it seems like it would be easier to just tuck the whole thing into the underpants!

Um, that's not how it works.

[Quaco]

Well, I don't do it, but it would be easier, you have to admit that -- if the shirt tail just goes in next to your skin, rather than navigating between two layers of material.

[Jimbo]

Suspenders would help to keep your trousers and shirt in place, no?

[beenieman]

I should tell you about the catholic woman from Corpus Christi who became a Messianic Jew ... and "juiced" her aloe vera plants.

What does that mean?

[BlueMeanie]

No tuck for me, unless I'm wearing a suit, then it's into the trousers but not the undies.

[BARON CORNY DOG]

I should tell you about the catholic woman from Corpus Christi who became a Messianic Jew ... and "juiced" her aloe vera plants.

What does that mean?

She was convinced that one of the secrets to long and healthy life was a diet heavy on fresh juice. She would refer to extracting juices out of plants and vegetables as "juicing" or "making a juice." She hit upon the idea that since aloe vera has many healing properties, the logical thing to do would be to put the cactus (or whatever it is) through the juicer and drink the pulp. The broader point is I have strange stories about dozens of crazy people I worked with at the last job, one of whom tucked his shirts into his drawers.

[Quaco]

Of course you can buy aloe vera juice at health food stores.

[Minnie the Minx]

Or for a tastier drink, you could lick the pus from roadkill.